TWFC

This week in possibly the most anticipated return from injury in football since Daniel Sturridge we welcomed back Shain, whom we had not seen in a competitive match since 18 February 2015.

Fresh from their recent comprehensive destructions of all before them this evening saw the Orange Bibs line up include the club No 1 keeper Steve and also Shain, a keeper from Ice Hockey where the puck is significantly smaller and faster than a football. This meant the Bibs could be confident of a secure defence.

In the middle of the park it was agreed that when the play maker Milo arrived he would join the Bibs and partner the all-conquering JonF, thereby giving the Bibs one of the most stable and creative midfields the club could ask for. Up front the Bibs had JakeFlowers our own version of Jamie Vardy, a player who scores every week accompanied by Avvon, one of the most accurately powerful strikers of the ball the club has seen, a sort of Frank Lampard crossed with an engaged Dimitar Berbatov.

When Scott allowed this selection there was a suspicion that either he had lost the plot or perhaps he had a cunning plan. It seemed he was inviting JonF to engage in a test of football ideologies. Starting with one player less Scott had Niyi in goal, a player who can sometimes stop a shot. He had a middle of the park comprising himself, with the unerring ability to keep plugging away at an opposition breaking them down from the start to the end of a match, a sort of modern day gentle philosophical Vieira. He was to be accompanied by AlMaher, a player likely to do his midfield duties and then to go forward and double as an accomplished striker. Alongside them or in front of them (depending where he was needed) was Johnny who can be likened to a grass roots Gareth Bale type of player able to turn a match just by setting his mind to it. The Bib’s attack was therefore spearheaded by Ben, a striker who could rival Avvon for height and power and would now hopefully be high on confidence after his recent victory the previous week.

So 5 Muftis against 6 Bibs. JonF was reminded that at nominal half time the situation would be assessed and a bibbed player could be asked to swap sides.

The match commenced exactly where the Bibs had left off the previous week with them bearing down on the Muftis’ goal as they sought to get their range. This dominance lasted for almost two minutes then the Muftis scored to make it 1 – 0.

This was the first time a JonF team had been behind in nearly 120 minutes of competitive football. While this was registering AlMaher, Ben and Johnny hit again and it was 2 – 0. By the time Milo arrived to join the Bibs they were already a quick fire 3 – 0 down. Scott’s team had done what was expected and opened a healthy lead before the opposition’s extra man advantage commenced.

With Milo on the pitch the Muftis became necessarily more circumspect but still scored a fourth goal. With the Muftis sitting further back and soaking up the Bibs’ pressure it meant that the Bibs were having to try to score from distance. A perfectly executed snap shot from just inside the half revealed another dimension to JakeFlower’s repertoire and brought off a reflex save from the keeper.

Ben, who had spent a long period seemingly in the doldrums until his victory the previous week, was now on fire. It will be remembered by some who watched that the pitch surface seemed to actually sparkle as he ran at the opposition and exploded balls into their goal. Soon it was Muftis 5 – Bibs 0. The Muftis’ trinity of AlMaher, Ben and Johnny were still battering the Bibs for all they were worth. During this passage of play Scott is believed to have leathered a ball into the net from a pace and a half into the opposition half. Why do I say ‘believed’? It is because the adrenaline of watching a comprehensive display can leave one light headed. Soon it was 7 – 0 to the Muftis and Scott and Ben went down in history as the only players in recent records to have twice been party to orchestrating halves of football where they had scored at least seven goals whilst limiting the opposition to nil, nul, zero points (a sort of modern day Eurovision score allocation).

JonF was receiving some of his own medicine, the saving grace was that as the Muftis plotted for going for the outright record of 8 – 0 the Bibs were able to get a goal back to bring the score to 7 – 1. Avvon also crafted a move for himself that put him through on the keeper to smash home a goal to further reduce the deficit, however when your luck is not in things just refuse to go in your favour and Avvon was cruelly denied. The solitary goal however had brought some much needed confidence back to the Bibs and despite being subjected to a Johnny masterclass they did score at least three goals of their own. Muftis 10 – Bibs 3. JonF was asked if he might consider relinquishing a player as half time had passed. His enigmatic smile and rueful shake of the head spoke volumes and the Bibs were allowed to finish the match with the numerical advantage.

Unlike the previous week this week the other team were arriving. This was going to be an allocated hour match. Any comeback would need to be swift.

The Bibs put their foot down on the pedal and scored a further four goals but even as they did this the Muftis scored another three. As the gate was opened the score stood at Muftis 13 Bibs 7. Scott had masterminded a victory of monumental proportions.

Match awarded to the Muftis 13 – 7.

Things to Note

Next week sees the return of Jorge as he again travels 500 miles and 500 more just to be the man who comes a thousand miles to get to our door (see the paraphrase of the Proclaimers’ song there).
Our game has evolved to match ups of captains managing teams, harnessing talent and motivating players. 2015 will be remembered as the year we came of age. After the next match, let us retire to an ale house and have a year-end drink to celebrate 2015.