TWFC

As always we were grateful to the guests who kindly came to make up our numbers. We only managed 11 players. Not fancying the shenanigans that 6 v 5 brings, Niyi opted to be referee. MarkA had done it enough times in the past, how hard could it be? Last week we had seen the Brazilian Brilliance, this week the teams were set up to showcase the Portuguese Poise of Fabio and Guest Diogo.

Despite opening the scoring and keeping reasonably apace with the Blue Bibs, by 8.45pm the Mufti were behind 10 - 6. Guest Trisdon had scored a hat-trick that exposed the Mufti's goalkeeper to shots of the kind of blunt force trauma in football that Deontay Wilder dishes out in the boxing ring. Fabiocc17 had once dismissively said that goalkeepers exist to get hit by balls. If Steve had been hit by any of the bombs Trisdon blasted at him them he would likely have been severely concussed. However, to balance things Fabiocc17 had scored a hat-trick of his own which included a twice taken penalty. This week Fabiocc17 was penalised for striking his penalty while the goalkeeper, JonF, was still talking to the referee. Without a whistle to call Fabiocc17 back he was already at the halfway line before he learned his penalty was to be retaken. With classic nonchalance he asked both JonF and the referee how they could ask for a retake when the result would still be the same outcome. And indeed, as prophesied, the ball was struck to the same spot on the keeper's left and the goal was finally chalked up. English football may not have seen such overwhelming self-confidence since the days of Eric Cantona.

The thing about the Blue Bibs being 10 - 6 ahead was that every member of their team had scored at least one goal, whereas for the Mufti only three of their players had actually scored and an unfortunate own goal by an opponent had helped them chalk up their tally of six goals. From the sidelines it looked like it was going to be a painful night for the Mufti and it was noted that they began to question and challenge each other. If the likes of VIIGeorgeVII had been playing this is probably the moment he might have seized upon to gently slip in the odd psychological barb to help the opposition spiral into disillusionment. Kindly, no one on the Blue Bibs side played those mind games and the Mufti had their disagreements but they were not tripped into full blown implosion.

A goal was ruled out for an area infringement, the absence of a whistle meant that the players were celebrating before eventually learning that the goal had been disallowed. There was some irritation but players seemed to take the rough with the smooth.

By 9.00pm the Blue Bibs lead 13 - 10. JonF had scored a hat-trick and Guest Eren had scored a brace for the Bibs. Guest Leon had quietly scored four goals for the Mufti, which included a four minute hat-trick. Guest Trisdon was still raining lightening bolts down on Steve's goal but the battle we had anticipated for months was in progress. Hagenius was up against his guest Trisdon. Irresistible force was meeting immovable object. Striker was meeting resolute defender. Guest Trisdon had notched up four goals but he was not having it all his own way and he seemed to be reduced to more shots from distance. Steve would later express heartfelt gratitude for Hagenius's defensive blocks.

The team after us were not coming so it was agreed we would play until 9.30 (note that time and also think of every football match you have ever watched in your life).

By 9.15 Blue Bibs lead 15 - 13, but they were not putting much daylight between themselves and the Mufti. Guest Diogo had scored a brace for the Mufti and contributed to the attacking line that had led to Guest Leon's second hat-trick, he was a bit slower with this one as it took him six minutes.

Going into the final five minutes of the match the score was Blue Bibs 18 - 16 Mufti. For the Blue Bibs Eddie117 and Elvis had both brought up their hat-tricks and Guest Trisdon had seen his way to a haul of seven goals. Now this was the point when we ask ourselves could the Blue Bibs play that tactical game where they would attempt to run down the clock or would they continue to play Ange ball and hit the their opponents with everything they had. The clue was in the fact that Fabio had scored five goals for the Mufti and Guest Leon had scored eight. They needed to be smothered. If Andyhibbert, VIIGeorgeVII, Ellislewis123 or MarkA had been on the Blue Bibs side they might hve said words to the effect of 'we are leading, let them chase'. To be fair Guest Trisdon did try to check the score but it was just too difficult to work it out from my notes. The general understanding on the pitch was that it was really close and both teams had to go for it.

Guest Leon brought up his ninth goal. The consensus was that there was one goal in it. We now know the score was Blue Bibs 18 - 17 Mufti. As the clock ticked down, a midfield clash saw Guest Trisdon hit the deck and not get up. The game went on but he stayed prone on the ground. The referee gestured that the game needed to pause but, without a whistle, there was no way the Mufti attack could know what had happened. There was some dispute about the game being pulled back and the Mufti losing the advantage. The referee explained that the game was paused on the long standing TWFC convention that we always stop if a player is down. Guest Trisdon was helped to his feet and the game continued. The referee indicated that he would add a minimum of one minute of injury time to cover the time spent attending to Guest Trisdon.

On the stroke of 9.30 Guest Leon scored his tenth goal for the Mufti. The excellent comeback was complete. Guest Diogo seized the ball and declared the match over. The referee said they were into injury time. Blue Bibs players began shaking hands with their opponents. The referee asked all to play out the allotted injury time. That voice that we can never identify said we don't play injury time. All players decided they had had enough of a referee without a whistle and ended the match.

All stopped except two. Fabiocc17, whom we have noticed is a stickler for the rules, said he was willing to play out the last minute. Eddie117 also played on and scored for the Blue Bibs in an empty net that Steve had vacated. The referee had to negate the goal because 80% of the players had, of their own volition, stopped playing. Eddie117 said that was not his fault but it had to be accepted that rest of the players had ended the match.

Guest Leon had scored 10 goals and assisted others in a quiet masterful performance that I can only liken to N'Golo Kanté, Kevin De Bruyne and Mo Salah rolled into one. This propelled him to third place on TWFC's all time list of most goals scored in an even sided match. The match ball is therefore awarded to Guest Leon.

At the end of the game Coach Hagenius mentioned that in refereeing a match the official must make decisions and those must be abided by. Football in essence is not a democracy. Various scores were advanced after the match but my referee's notebook recorded the goals as set out above and the final score of the brilliant night is as below.

Final Score

Mufti 18 - 18 Blue Bibs

Match declared a Noble Draw.

Let's do it all again next mach at Tottenham Wednesday FC